The arch of protection for a child is made up of building blocks of love which should be being provided by their parents.
1 Truth
- God has so designed children that they can cope with the truth, however bad it is. They are not able to cope when they are given lies or when the truth is hidden from them. This does not mean that children should be burdened with unnecessary details of something upsetting, but they should be given clear and accurate information which will not leave them unable to trust what is said to them.
2 Forgiveness
- Once a child has done wrong, they need a way back to peace which involves recognising the wrong, saying sorry, and knowing that the matter is resolved. Parents will at times need to say sorry to their children, and show them this process by example. Leaving wrongs unresolved can cause ongoing problems.
3 Cleanness
- If a child is unclean inside, then they have picked up dirt from somewhere. It is a responsibility of parents to protect them from any uncleanness which could infect them. Uncleanness in things that the parents allow in their home, or in their own lives, will affect their children.
4 Presence
- Children need the presence of parents much more than presents from them. It is not possible for parents to be with their children all the time, but time spent with children is very important for them. A good way of keeping things right in this matter is to follow the advice: – if you have to borrow time from your family, that’s okay. Just make sure that you pay it back!
5 Security
- Children should have the commitment of permanence from their parents. “I am totally committed to you, I am not going to abandon you, I will not leave you. You can know that the point is not going to come in your life when I will go away and not come back.” Because of the insecurities in many family relationships, it is important that children are aware they have no need to fear being left.
6 Hugs
- Children need to be hugged. It is immensely important for children that not only are they told that they are loved, or even that they believe that they are loved, but they know and feel that they are loved because affection has been demonstrated to them.
7 Friendship
- Children’s parents should share in the things that their children are interested in, so that things that are precious to the child are therefore valued by the parent, and they are able to enjoy these things together. Parents are meant to play with their children. Times of fun and laughter together lets the child know that they are liked as well as loved.
8 Direction
- For children to know where they are in life, they need to know what their family’s aim and purpose is. It will make a lot of difference to children if they are told why the family is living where it is living, and why their parents are doing what they are doing in their work and in their other activities.
9 Discipline
- Discipline is meant to do the same four things that are mentioned in 2 Timothy 3:16 as what the Scriptures are useful for:-
- Teaching the truth – this is setting out the way and showing where the boundaries are.
- Rebuking – letting the child know when they have stepped over the boundary.
- Correcting – helping the child to be brought back onto the right way.
- Instruction in right living – encouragement to move on in the right way again.
10 Honour
- Children should be given a special place of value by their parents. They need to hear positive words which encourage and build them up. The way they are spoken about and the way they are related to should continually reinforce their preciousness.
11 Knowing Jesus
- This is the keystone for the covering of love over a child – that they should have parents who know Jesus for themselves and who share his love and his ways with them. Parents owe it to their children to provide then with a full Holy Spirit experience of Jesus’ kingdom in their family. Life was never designed to be lived any other way!
Rebuilding the Covering – Replacing Missing Building Blocks
- Every parent will recognise that not only are there parts missing from their children’s experience, there are also gaps in their own experience, which can leave them wondering, “How can I build with what I have not got?” The answer is that all these necessary building blocks are in Jesus, and if we allow him to minister to us he can rebuild for us so that we can rebuild for our children.
- Truth – Jesus said, “I am the truth” (John 14:6) and “You will know the truth and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:32)
- Forgiveness – Jesus said, “Your sins are forgiven.” (Luke 5:20)
- Cleanness – Jesus said, “You have been made clean by the words I have spoken to you.” (John 14:18)
- Presence – Jesus said, “I will not leave you as orphans, I will come back to you.” (John 14:18)
- Security – Jesus said, “I will give you a helper to stay with you for ever.” (John 14:16)
- Hugs – Jesus took them up in his arms. (Mark 10:16)
- Friendship – Jesus said, “I call you friends.” (John 15:15)
- Direction – Jesus said, “I must go… because that is why I came.” (Mark 1:38)
- Discipline – Jesus said, “Get behind me.” (Mark 8:33)
- Honour – Jesus said, “I gave them the glory that you gave me.” (John 17:22)
- Knowing Jesus – Jesus said, “Eternal life means knowing you the only true God and Jesus Christ whom you have sent.” (John 17:3)
Jesus said that the thief came to steal, kill and destroy but that he came to bring life in all its fullness (John 10:10). Jesus is totally committed to make up completely for every hurt, loss or damage that has been caused in our lives by ourselves, by others, by the Devil or by the circumstances of life. Allowing him to minister to us means that we will have resources for ministering to our children. Wherever the gap is in parents or in their children, Jesus can fill it.